i've been pretty happy lately, so that's probably why i haven't been writing...

only around 21 days left of school...it's saddening. i really enjoyed high school, and i'm afraid to go to college. i would like to meet new people, something tells me i could find some good ones =)

however, i'm very, very scared. i feel like i'm going in all alone.

so, A Midsummer Night's Dream is over. it was a privilege directing it, and it got many, many great compliments.
The PM Jazz Band is doing great, i only wish it could last longer...

i'm totally skipping out on Henry Ford Orchestra. the concert is tomorrow, but i haven't gone in way over a month, i would be totally unprepared. we payed money for it, but i didn't forsee all of the things i would have to miss practice for.

anyway, it seems like a great music program, it won't be bad going there for college...

i'm going to visit on thursday. we'll see how that goes.


and the biggest news of all, Prom is this Saturday. I'm going with Cam Leedy, which will definitely be a good time =)

i'm not too worried about it, but i know i will be in a few days. it's a big thing, Senior Prom...

hopefully i won't make any mistakes i'll regret. knowing me, i'd probably give into any small pressure. we'll just have to see.

i'm excited =) so far, everything i have is absolutely gorgeous. i'm so lucky. i don't thank my parents enough.

i suppose that'll be all for now. for those who read, thanks a lot =)
-Georgia

Current Music: www.myspace.com/alovelybreakdown (i have a good playlist, check it out.) =]

i want this one prom dress
but it's 420 dollars


and that started everything.
this week has been terrible.

friends help, though =)
i'm so glad for all of them now, i never realized i had so many before.

thanks =)

Current Music: sweet escape- gwen stefani

Grease is over =) i'm glad, but it's kinda saddening.

i'm sittin in mentorship class with megan and we're bored as crap.

myspace is blocked.
she won't let us go to addictinggames.com

it's pretty annoying.
forget resumes.


basically worthless.

not really but you know. it's just boring.

so ummm yeah i'm just writing in here because there's nothing to do.

anyone have any plans for this week? call me if you do, i guess.
-Geo

Current Location: Mrs. Menna's room
Current Music: NOTHINGGGG =(

Grease will be this weekend, thursday, friday, and two performances saturday.
i'm pretty excited but verrry nervous. i'm sure it'll be great though =)

It's only just a crush, it'll go away
It's just like all the others it'll go away
Or maybe this is danger and you just don't know
You pray it all away but it continues to grow

I want to hold you close
Skin pressed against me tight
Lie still, and close your eyes, boy
So lovely, it feels so right

I want to hold you close
Soft breath, beating heart
As I whisper in your ear
I want to fucking tear you apart

^^^ basically how i feel right now.
for some reason i just can't allow myself to let go of this guy.
i know he'll never like me, and i know for sure he likes this other girl.
but i don't know...i still think it would somehow work, but the only problem is it would never be spoken. i know he would never say a word even if he did like me.

so that means it's all up to me, and how much courage i can get up eventually. how much i can insinuate liking him. how embarrassed i will be when i start to talk to him about it...

how afraid i will be that it will mess up our friendship.

but i know that if i never tell him...i could be passing up an opportunity...and also if i don't get it out to him and get it over with...i'll either never have closure on it, go crazy from not knowing, somebody will find out and tell him and then i'll be really embarrassed, or the worst..

i will keep it bottled up inside for so long that it will start affecting my smile.
and i can't do that.
or else he'll make fun of me and call me emo.

so basically, something has to be done soon.

maybe i'll get up the courage before the last curtain closes...



love,
ms. obvious

Current Music: tear you apart- she wants revenge

the musical is going great.

today was the first dress rehearsal...it was fun, but so stressful and tiring. i have a complex costume change that has to happen in like three minutes. i don't know how i'm ever going to make it...

in other news, i'm pretty lonely. senior year is dwindling down and i still don't have someone that can be there for me like i wanna be there for them. someone to hold when times are tiring or down, and someone to have fun and dance with when things are hyped. i know that's a really juvenile way of writing, but that's how i feel right now.

it's kinda gotten to the point where i don't really care who it is anymore...i wish i did care, i feel like i'm losing myself to loneliness when i don't.

just let me lean on your shoulder, someone...even if it goes nowhere, that's all i want right now.

two half days in a row i haven't found anyone to go out to lunch with. i feel so separated. my 6th hour is mentorship and i could have left for lunch early or gone home...instead i waited another hour for everyone to get out of class, hoping i would find somebody, anyone, to eat lunch with.

i didn't find anyone. it was a waste. even people i thought were my friends passed me by in the hallway, saw me walking alone, and either assumed i had plans or didn't want to invite me anywhere. i asked a few people, but they all halfway ignored the comment on their way out the door...
i would rather not impose myself upon people by inviting myself somewhere...don't i have any friends? who are the people i talk to everyday? where are they when i need them?

someplace without a single thought to me.


whatever, i guess i'm done complaining...my mommy is making angel hair spaghetti and a really good salad.

call me or IM me if you wanna talk, though chances of that happening are probably slim.

Current Music: Hopelessly Devoted to You- Olivia Newton John

so let me get this straight
say now you loved me all along?
what made you hesitate
to tell me with words what you really feel
i can see it in your eyes you mean all of what you say
i remember so long ago, see i felt that same way
now we both have separate lives and lovers (and lovers)
insignificantly enough we both have significant others

only time will tell
time will turn and tell

we are who we were when
could've been lovers but at least you're still my day late friend
we are who
we are who we were when
who knew what we know now
could've been more but at least you're still my day late friend
we are who
we are who we were when

but thoughts they change and times they rearrange i don't know who you are anymore
loves come and go and this i know i'm not who you recall anymore
but i must confess you're so much more then i remember
can't help but entertain these thoughts
thoughts of us together

we are who we were when
could've been lovers but at least you're still my day late friend
we are who
we are who we were when
who knew what we know now
could've been more but at least you're still my day late friend
we are who
we are who we were when

my day late friend

so let me get this straight
all these years and you were no where to be found
and now you want me for your own
but you're a day late and my love,she's still renowned
we are who we were when
could've been lovers but at least you're still my day late friend
we are who
we are who we were when
who knew what we know now
could've been more but at least you're still my day late friend
we are who
we are who we were when...







if only i had gotten there first...
now i won't ever have a chance..

Current Music: anberlin

blank


blank except for that line

blinking

appearing and reappearing

blinking like it's laughing at you

why don't you know what to say, Georgia?

should i know what to say

are there right things to say

to make everything go the way you want



there it is again, keeping time with it's black

fading into the white

over and over

staring at it gives you nothing but tears

leaking from your unused ink...

something comes to mind,

your finger hovers over that enter key,

is this the right thing to say?

start over again, lucky backspace button

that allows you to prevent so many events,

to make so many happenings,

that allows the altering of time before it even starts...

that backspace key

that brings you back to space one,

where you are free to create with dire consequences...

and the raw, steady laughter of the typing cursor,

true to it's pronunciation albeit a letter,

resounding in your head,

knowing that if it was a sound bite

it would gnaw your nerve out before you even touched the keyboard




oh, geo

what's with your head this time

are you screaming inside,

or crying?

Current Music: Run- Air

so i was hoping to use this journal more for obscure thoughts, but sometimes i can't help but feel like blatantly writing about my feelings when i know certain people probably won't ever see this.
like for instance, there's this girl at school that constantly talks about me, saying all kinds of horrible things. she talks behind my back, but is not at all afraid to say things to my face, either.
it's truly bothersome, because this girl and i had been on and off friends since the beginning, but i've always thought we'd turn out just fine. especially this year, when i don't really care about anything at all. like, there is usually absolutely no drama on my mind, i don't care to start it or to be involved in it. but this girl thrives in it and lives for it. she finds nothing more amusing than to lower the spirits of others, and have herself be the center of attention. i guess she thinks she can do everything better than everyone else, or at least just me. maybe i do really suck at my job, but then again i haven't really been putting much effort into it either.

next week i'm going to seriously get done what needs to be done, and i'm going to try my best to not let anyone get in my way. especially her.

if i allow doubt in my mind, i'll fail for sure. i'm just going to have to build up my strength and be as reasonable as i can while still feeling the unavoidable extremities of anger and sadness that she inflicts upon me.

Current Location: school library, 6th hour.

yeah. a livejournal. i've decided.

instead of wasting countless pieces of paper in school...
maybe i should just start typing out all of my feelings...
and sure, let's make it public. because sometimes i feel really closed up inside, like i can't share anything i'm feeling. now at least i care to share a little..
at least in words.

some things nobody will ever be able to understand besides me.
some things might be easy to figure out.
but i don't ever think i'll make the truth so clear...

this is everyone's chance.
if you haven't gotten the chance to know me this year...or last year..or recently...
this is your chance to at least see my inner workings. the veil over the secrets.

it's completely up to you to lift that veil...or not.

come, read into me.
my life is an open book.

-me.